Many think spirit-work to be glamorous. It isn’t. It’s work. It’s grief, sweat, and tears. Joys do come but they come at a price. Sometimes I wake in the middle of the night and write. This one I give to you- raw and unedited from my own failing seethe.


They are Ever.

I need you to know before you read this that I can love. Don’t think I’m writing that I can’t. I know how to love. My love is like the flutter of dove wings held to breast, like the thunderous roar of a lion, or the softest footsteps of a mouse. I was once told that I am too small for my love.

I can love.

But, haven’t you ever thought that we humans can only go so far? I mean no matter how much work we do, time we spend, sweat and tears we pour, that we can only go so far? Our human forms fail us, our meat brains just can’t transcribe that which is just beyond.

Haven’t you ever stood before Him in all glory and felt that boundary as though a glass wall? We can love and merge and join and open but there comes a point when we have to secede.  Then, we are forced to just yearn knowing that there is more, there is always closer and more; it is just right there, so close and ever so far.

See, there is a special kind of haunting. It’s the haunting of the almost is. That almost is, that almost reaching the deity just beyond the glass, that glass we are eternally running to.

And running from.

The almost is haunts.

And that’s when our hearts cry out in the night, that’s when we ram our fists into our pillows, that’s when we grieve.

For it is then we face our own mortality. They are Ever, we are but the Now.

Picture from Lenscratch.  

3/3/2012 04:01:54 pm

Sometimes we have to be satisfied with simply being brushed by their greatness. I am glad for every small bit of knowledge, every vision, and the fact that they acknowledge someone as insignificant as me. I think to expect anything more is vanity on our part.

- Glenn Bergen

An Independent Asatru

3/3/2012 05:04:05 pm

Exactly Glenn!

3/3/2012 04:18:05 pm

This is beautiful! Thank you for sharing!

3/3/2012 05:04:28 pm

You're welcome :)

3/6/2012 12:34:58 pm

This is beautifully written; so much what I feel and yet couldn't find the words to express.
But you have.
Thank you for sharing your words with us.

9/4/2012 04:09:47 am

Wow this is... unexpected... I've just remember this night as I read you. I made a dream, about one God... and it what precisely about a wall, a separation between us that couldn't be bridged.... Now that I've read you, I think there may be something to meditate upon, I should ask that God what this dream meant....


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